In college I had an ideal of what I wanted to do. Before college I wanted to be a bounty hunter. For years my grandparents were scared. Then once I picked a major in college I decided to be a cardiologist because I wanted to fix hearts literally. After my med school dreams went up in smoke, because I didn’t believe in myself and my grades were awful, I decided to be a sociology professor. The dream was good while I was in college, but once I got out into the world I found sociology professors far and few between. My first professional job was as a program assistant/receptionist at an AIDS service organization, within a year I got promoted to Prevention Specialist (Counseling, Testing, and referrals). Whatever I do I am going to give back to the community. I find myself not interested in HIV Prevention. For me it’s too narrow and my work is becoming mechanical. I want to do something with more creativity. I think that’s why I have been putting off graduate school. First I wanted a Masters in Public Administration, now it’s Public Health. What do I really want to do? I don’t mind paperwork, but I do not want to be swamped in paperwork. I know whatever it is, it has to keep me learning and engage me. HIV does not engage me. I want set hours where I see people; I have clients constantly disrupting my work and train of thought. I just really have some soul searching to do. Because really I don’t know what I want to do. Or maybe I do know and I’m afraid to go after it.