This is just my own opinion on the matter.
1. Be confident. Whatever you do be confident. Be confident with who you are, firstly. Because they will try to come for you (start some mess). Secondly be confident in whatever you are doing. Because they will try and come for you, especially if things are going right.
2. Do not get caddy. They will take all the information you give them and use it against you. So keep small talk to a minimum.
3. Do not take any of their mess personal. If you are a woman sometimes you can take a lot of heat from black gay men because they have issues with women. And they tend not to express themselves in regards to their emotions clearly.
4. Learn from them. A couple of things I have learned is to enjoy life a little. And to be a little stronger.