Soul Searching

Over the next month I am going to be doing some soul searching.  Many people say that change happens whenever you want to change to happen.  I like having a new year with a new beginning and propose.  I am reflecting over the last couple of years so I can start building a stronger foundation.  I use to be so strong, in my opinion.  Over the years reality and my depiction of things have warn me down.   I have decided I am going to come out on top.

I am praying that I will not lose many friends because I am sort of attached to the people in my life.  I am just going through a hard time.  I want people to be there but I understand that you cannot expect people to truly know and feel what you are going through. 

I just think that next time this month I will be so much more pain free, thank God.  For so long I have been in so much pain and I thought I was imagining it.  I thought it was regular cramps and pains. I realize the mistakes I have made and I am grateful I caught them in time.  I am grateful that I have insurance that will cover the surgery.

Again soul searching, I have to figure out what’s good and right for me.  I am the type of person that does research and need a conscious.  (laugh).  I am growing up, I need to seek non bias parties and live my life the way I think is right.

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