• Still working on the bicostal planning for this baby shower.  It’s confirmed  that the baby is a girl.
  • I’ve decided that tomorrow I will make phone calls to everyone who has left me messages, which is a good number of my friends.  I’ve been avoiding most people because I’ve been in a sucky mood.
  • I’m working on several midterm projects.  Cooperative federalism vs. Dual Federalism and stuff like that.  Blah, blah, blah.
  • I’m becoming more tense.
  • I have two doctors appointments on Tuesday.  I also have to bring up the fact that I have abscess or boils in a place that is odd, he’ll look because that is what I pay he him to do.  My mom is going with me to my eye appointment.
  • I have not been working on my writing or goals, my marriage to myself is on seperation (lol).

Here’s What it is

How about I don’t want to type up my notes for class tomorrow.  I need to have it together though and under control.  We might be having class on saturday and I need to be on point.  I still don’t want to type it up.

 I am uncomfortable.  I just am.  I can’t sit comfortably.  I can’t see comfortably and it’s aggravating.

I have to work early tomorrow.  I don’t even know what I am going to bring for lunch.  I hope that I am not on register 1 or any other speedy register.  I would love to be on register 5 or something like that.  I love big buggies and ringing up on big registers.

My hair is a mess.  I have a frizz nap going on.  Don’t ask and I will not try to explain it.

My Situation

  • My anxiety is taking over my life, in episodes.  How fun is that?!  Now my face tingle which is crazy.
  • I need a job, I cannot stress how much I need another job.
  • Economics Assignment is coming along.  Seeing how I got a C on the first one, I need an A on this one.  I’m receiving help from a questionable source. LMAO.
  • My eyes hurts.
  • BFF is pregnant and tired.  I worry about her, too.  It’s going to be a long road.
  • My stomach is exploding, fast.  I can’t wear any of my pants.  😦  I refuse to get it checked out.  Refuse.  I cannot afford surgery nor new pants.
  • Can’t stop thinking about Glee’s rendition of Teenage Dream.

He Cares and other random things

Since the guy I have a crush on has come back to work we’ve been chatting.  Last night was a turning point because I found out he cared what I thought about him.  We had conversations about his goals and the future.  It made me giddy like a school girl.  Then I think maybe I’m not down with him, but who would care what anyone thinks?  I don’t know.

On another note, I was able to put in my contacts.  Yay me.  I didn’t realize how much eye sight effects your balance.  Three weeks without the right eye, one doctors appointment, and one referral later my eye is back in action.  And I am loving it.  I am grateful for my eyes.

School starts next Monday and I have to figure out how to get there.  I now it’s off Cobb Pky but I think I’m going to go super early to make sure I know exactly where it is.  Can you say excited?  There is one book that I have problems reading, I’m going to pray on that one.  The book is about policy and theory which sucks.  Theories always throws me, I think I just have to battle it.  (Reference: Like Harry Potter and He Who Must Not Be Named.)

I’ve also been thinking a lot about vacations.  I do need a job to go on vacation, but I’m planning all the same.  Within the next 12 months I will be going to London, England and Orlando, Florida.  Excited.

Do You Have a Life Plan?

I hadn’t thought about a life plan until recently.  Mostly my concern has been financial.  I think life plan is a little large.  I say living more in the moment is key.  My plan is more along the lines of five years, in which I’ll be 32.  Wow.

My plan:

  • Have a Masters Degree in Public Health
  • Have had a boyfriend or two
  • Be in a serious relationship
  • Have a solid emergency fund
  • Have a solid house fund
  • Have my health under control

NO Health Insurance

It sucks not having insurance.  This isn’t the first time I haven’t had insurance, while I was in college I was insuranceless.  It’s more of a problem now because I have hormones I have to take and an oncologist I have to see every three months.  I went to see how much my prescription would be without the insurance and the lady gasped.  A hundred dollars.  Yes, for only a month’s worth.  Well, thirty days worth anyway.  I don’t have money for this.

Where is my universal health care, which I was behind when I had insurance?

I also applied for supplemental health care through my old insurance carrier and they denied me.  Flat out denied me.  And I am not eligible for COBRA.

I am beside myself.  Beside.  I think I’m going to talk to the pharmacy at Wal-Mart and pray they can do something for me.

To make matters worse, I have had a slew of infections.  Eye infections to sinus infections to God knows what other infections.  My lymph nodes under my arms and throat have been swollen and in pain. 

I’m praying and I do have faith that everything will work out the way it’s supposed to.  I would just rather have insurance now.


I am really stressed out.  I’m not getting any call backs for interviews, I’m seeing less and less jobs being offered.  I feel no one understands because they’re not in this situation.  I didn’t understand until I barely have enough money to get the bills pay and eat and no health insurance.

I’m going to work on my stress though.

If anyone has any tips hit me up.


I was reading an article about hormone issues and women.  It hit close to home.  For years before I went to see a gynecologist I thought it was just regular female problems.  But I got insurance and I found out it was something else. I’m researching things that I have to do.  Things that might make me more comfortable.


The one word to sum up my 2009 is crazy.  2009 was a crazy year.  A very crazy year.


  • Lost fulltime job
  • Got parttime job
  • Multiple eye injuries
  • Two friends moved out of state
  • Bestie is still in California
  • Multiple infections
  • Saw a lot of movies in the theater
  • Lost some weight
  • Oncologist suggested gastric bypass
  • Have a huge cyst on my ovary, still
  • No health insurance
  • Want to cash out my 401k
  • Got to denial letters from graduate schools